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"We can work it out."


These past ten minutes have been the most overwhelming and lovely experiences of my entire life.

Yesterday I awoke from a dream that I did not want to end. It has been the first time Edward has ever appeared in my dreams so vividly and so peculiarly. lol I can't decide which feeling is welding up in my eyes or what has become of me...in these past ten minutes. Is this happiness, for if it is then oh god let me embrace it. It's overwhelmed me. I am speechless in a way that only God can imagine.

This morning I dreamt of Edward. Izzi was there and for some odd reason I didn't feel like paying him any mind. I was trying to be coy and trying to see if I could pull off the old "playing hard to get" game. But there was no need for it.

Izzi, in reality and in dream, is compulsive. I didn't want to make a big fuss over anything but she decided it would be better to stir the pot and ooh my if she doesn't go over there and start talking to him. My god I could kill her! So I turned away and continued what I was doing. A few moments later she comes back bearing a gift. "This is for you. It's from him." I was beside myself. My face grew hot and I'm pretty sure I was sweating. I opened it and began reading but for some reason unknown to me I cannot remember what it said. I was disturbed a little when I saw the drawing of a woman resembling that of Jessica Rabbit. As you may know...I look nothing like her. Then Izzi told me it was a drawing of Erika...

Yeah I was confused too. And then I woke up. 

But that's not what overwhelmed me. In my dream he wrote to me. And now. Not just fifteen minutes before, I checked my mail and there it was. A small reply to a small salutation. From him.

I don't know what's come over me. lol I don't know what to feel. This may sound silly and ridiculous but it's the most sweetest thing I've ever witnessed.

Does this mean that we have some mental bond? I don't think so. Does it mean that we were meant for each other? Heavens no! I'm not naive nor silly like that--much. But in a way, my heart is beating with a different kind of emotion, another kind of feeling. I believe my friends...it's hope.

And yes I may be weeping like a baby, but to tell you the truth I have no idea where they're coming from. I wish I could say without sounding simple that it could mean something, all of this, yesterday, the dream. I wish I could say that my dream was trying to tell me something, but that would just be defined as wishful thinking. And what is wishful thinking but hope--in disguise.

Many apologies for the rambling. I hope something makes sense. Now let me wipe away these silly old tears and go to bed.

Night my friends. Tomorrow. Today should not be wasted. For life is too short.

-E